Mega Man [1994]

One thing I don't think we appreciate enough about old "bad" video game to cartoon adaptations is just how wild the sheer concept of these cartoons is nowadays. As a kid with no access to The Internet and with no idea what The Source Material ever looked like, it was already kind of mind-blowing seeing characters from a video game expanded from little pixelly Guys In A Video Game into fully-formed cartoons. These were no longer just enemies for Mega Man to shoot and dodge, now they had voices and mannerisms and frequently got put in Situations. In an era before "extended universes" were the corporate-driven juggernaut they are today, this alone was absolutely BUCK WILD to behold.

Some jokes just write themselves honestly!

The 1994 Ruby-Spears Mega Man cartoon is predominantly remembered these days as a meme generator - literally anything Scott McNeil's Dr Wily says would make an excellent sound clip - but back in the early 90s, Mega Man was hitting the peak of his popularity and was about to get a series-redefining makeover with the SNES release of Mega Man X, still widely considered to be the definitive Mega Man experience by a number of fans. The cartoon mainly focuses on inspiration from Mega Man 1-5, with X only showing up in a late season 2 episode as a mysterious mercenary from the future, and mostly reads like any other classic superhero comic-book-turned-cartoon from the 60s through the 80s. Which is to say, not BAD, but certainly very predictable.

Patience, my pet...we shall soon crush that pesky little do-gooder!

But going back to my previous point, back in the 80s and 90s (well, long before that but especially prominent starting in the 80s), TV companies were rabidly chomping at the bit to get their hands on the latest craze, chasing after potential new franchises like flies after honey, and it resulted in all these weird nonsensical cartoon adaptations being made. Movies and games you would never have imagined got animated adaptations seemingly at complete random, including such Definitely-Made-For-Kids properties as Robocop and Little Shop of Horrors. And the actual content of these shows was all stuff you wouldn't expect to see today outside of a random artist's shitpost comic on Tumblr or Twitter. Episodes often felt completely random and had little to do with the "story" of the franchise they were from.

That's not Knight Man from Mega Man 6! What gives?!

And I think that's one thing I miss most about that era: ANY game or movie or toy line might suddenly get a cartoon series out of nowhere, regardless of how well known or established it was. Mario Bros had two cartoons before the series had any semblance of history, characterization, or defined style. Pac-Man before the games ever evolved beyond "waka waka waka waka". Captain N: The Game Master bringing us a himbofied Simon Belmont and pairing Mother Brain with Eggplant Wizard and King Hippo for reasons only heaven knows anymore.

Taking a risk on a potential hit with little history to pull from was the soup du jour back then, and it almost NEVER happens that way by today's standards. Not only would studios never risk ponying up the dough for such a production, audiences wouldn't like it either because they just expect different from their cartoons now.

Gone are the days of random unpredictable mayhem...

If watching Reaction Videos on YouTube has taught me anything, it's that modern audiences simply DO NOT care for episodic shows anymore. They're obsessed with Lore, Narrative, Story Advancement, Character Development, and a host of terminology they learned on TVTropes that they demand from every cartoon now. Old cartoon staples like sudden chaotic violence, goofy sight gags, cleverly using the reset button between episodes, and characters simply going on one-off adventures are met with bored shrugs and rolled eyes.

And as someone who still enjoys seeing shows about a ragtag group of blorbos going on weekly misadventures with no real destination in mind, it makes me a little sad that we don't get much of that anymore. Don't realize what you had until it's gone, I suppose?

I have no idea where the fuck this episode's plot came from but it was still funny as hell.

Don't get me wrong. I get that growing up in an era of purely episodic shows that would have made for some really cool story-telling makes you pine for the more serial nature of comic books, manga, and anime. And it's great that we've finally hit a point where we have cartoons that follow a serial plot full of consequences and character development and all that, but it's become so deeply cherished that people use their love of serial narrative to then scoff at episodic shows for being "pointless" because "nothing ever happens in them". I'm talking about "people" in a loose sense of the word here, mostly aimed at the Reaction Video crowd I guess.

...anyway, what was I saying? Oh right, Mega Man.

Don't worry dude, I don't know how to parallel park either.

With a show like this one, it's actually super freeing to watch a show where there's no real Lore to adhere to, no References to catch beyond "oh, that's Crystal Man from Mega Man 5!" Here, a typical episode reads like a wacky unhinged roleplay session, like Dr Wily trying to build a super-powerful laser gun on the surface of the moon, or weird mummified were-lions rising up from the dead to transform all humans on the planet into one of their own. What do those things have to do with Mega Man's history or character development? Nothing! It's just a random adventure about some weird little guys doing their thing! You don't have to constantly be paying attention or reading between the lines or guessing which character is going to cameo next. You can just sit back and watch the show, and be entertained when Dr Wily orders Guts Man to unlock a door and he just fuckin PUNCHES IT OPEN because he's Guts Man and that's just how he is!

Lemme get that for ya, boss.

I hope we can eventually get to a point again where studios are willing to foot the bill for people to make any old thing into a cartoon series. Especially when they give the writers complete creative freedom to just fuck around with the formula and produce something completely unique out of it. I'll always prefer something that takes clear inspiration from the original framework of the source material but doesn't bothering to adhere to Canon over a show that's obsessed with getting all the details right. I don't mind seeing people point out the little References (hey, I do it too), but when your entire show revolves around KNOWING the References and GETTING the plot and following things to the letter, it kinda strips it of the very thing that would otherwise make it special: it's own personality.

In my opinion, a good cartoon adaptation should be more of "a take on" the original than just "we took the original and added animation to it". That's what makes or breaks a show for me! Give me that fucked up live action Mario movie with Bob Hoskins over the new animated one with Crisp Rat any day of the week!

Rush is gonna get so many cavities if you keep feeding him dynamite.

Anyway, what else can I say? You aren't exactly missing out on anything incredible by skipping this show, so don't feel compelled to go watch it immediately. But it's good for a laugh and a good dose of inspiration for what you COULD do within the framework of Mega Man and have it still be completely recognizable. I enjoyed my time with this show just as much as I enjoyed growing up with Mega Man 1-6 on the NES as a kid. It was truly a treat to see how they turned all those little Guys into actual characters!

Now when does Mega Girl from Captain N get HER own Netflix series?!